The Joy of the Lord Is Our Strength

I've got the joy, joy, joy, joy down in my heart!
Where?
Down in my heart.
Where?
Down in my heart.
I've got the joy, joy, joy, joy down in my heart to stay!

Wow! Had to get that out. That tune has been in my head for 3 days now and it is driving me bananas! Now getting to the lesson...

Have you got joy down in your heart? I'm sure you are sitting there thinking, 'uh, why of course I do, Kacie. Silly question.' Is it? If you have joy, then why? What are you joyful about?

At the beginning of the week I would have said of course I have joy! I have a adoring husband who, in spite of my many many flaws, loves me and wouldn't walk thru life with anyone else. I have a family who loves and supports me. Friends who are there for me at the drop of a hat. I am joyful because I have a job, food in my frig and a closet full of clothes. What's not to be joyful about?

Well I got a reality check...a big one! Every one of those things listed above can be yanked away from me at any given moment. Then what would I have to be joyful about?

Beth wasted no time on day one letting me know what I ought to be joyful about. She let me know MY name is written in heaven! Written on the walls for all to see! Pretty amazing huh? Just sit there and really think about that. For all my flaws and all my failures in life, God has forgiven me and reserved a spot for me next to Him. He knew before the world was even created that one day I would be dancin' in His streets!

So day one and two I was pumped and on this joy high, then I went to day three and got that reality check I was talking about. Hardships? I'm not supposed to have hardships and be joyful at the same time. They do not go together. This must be a misprint. Little did realize I was about to learn a valuable lesson.

At this point in my life there has been 3 major events that have rocked my world so hard I was barely able to stand straight. During each event, I questioned God and wondered how He could let these things happen. I never really struggled with death much growing up. Most of the people I knew who passed where older and it was just their time. I completely understood and accepted that. But I started resenting death, if that is possible, several years ago when someone very precious to me was called home. I couldn't understand why they were ripped from their family at such an unexpected time. It happened 2 more times, both just last year. I had, and still do have, a hard time dealing with each death. I know God has a plan for everything but when I think about those 3 precious lives that have been taken away, I can't see the plan nor can I see the joy. Day 3 made me realize I have to go through that pain and suffering to be able to know Christ better. To know the suffering He experienced. Beth says, 'I am convinced we cannot begin to really know Christ until we learn to fellowship with Him in His suffering.' If you have ever gone through a tragedy with someone, how much closer are you now than before? You're closer because you experienced the same suffering and know the pain. That's how it has to be with Christ. We will never be able to understand His suffering if we don't suffer a little ourselves.

Today I sit here with joy in my heart. I know God is in control and He will take care of me. Continuing to have joy in my heart and not let hardships damper that, will be a challenge. I hope you will challenge yourself too. Life will never be easy, but your life will always be good with God.

Greatest of These Is Love

Love- a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person; a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend; affectionate concern for the well-being of others.

Hmm...where to start this week. This is supposed to be one of those topics I should be able to go on and on about but there was so much for me to take in that I'm not sure where to start. I guess day one is as good as any although I won't go into too much detail for one, your intimate relationship with your spouse is your business and for two, my mother reads this so there will be no share time on this topic! :) I will, however, tell you I found all of day one interesting. I guess because sex is every where these days and its all people can talk about, that you just take it for granted. You forget that it's one of the most precious gifts God gave us to share will our spouse. Its the one thing a wife can give her husband that no one else can give and vice versa. It just made me revisit the real reason for an intimate relationship.

Day two was my favorite! I found myself nodding my head a lot because when you that one friend or friends that you are just bonded to, there is nothing like it. It is so powerful! You hear all the sappy sayings 'when you're hurt, I hurt,' or 'when you're happy, I'm happy.' I roll my eyes but it is the truth. I have been known to be right there beside a friend when they have just experienced some tragic in their lives and I feel like it has happened to me. Just the same when they have had something amazing happen to them, I have a grin on my face for days because I know they're happy. I consider my friends my family as I'm sure you do too. They are just life's best gifts!

Characteristics of Agape. I loved the way Beth presented this. It was nice for me to really focus on each one and remind myself how I ought to be. The one I am constantly having to remind myself of is being patient. I try with every bone in my body to have patience for people and most of the time I do, but God really likes to test me. Especially when I am driving down the road. He will usually pick a day when I'm running a little later than normal and put an elderly person out for their morning stroll or a huge tractor in front of me and make it impossible to pass. My road rage switch turns on and it is all I can do not to mow over them. They make it impossible for me to "live peaceably with everyone." I was just tested this week and I told God that today was not a good day to test me because I would fail miserably! He didn't listen and I was forced to take a deep breath and take in the scenery!

Day four just continued with the characteristics of agape and I found myself stopping at Proverbs 21:19 and reading it out loud to Brent. Bless his heart, my "gift" came this week and I have done nothing but complain and start silly fights. I mean the devil just grabs me for a few days without me realizing it and I grow horns and spit fire. He of course laughed but I felt really bad for my behavior. It was definitely a God thing that I would read this the first day of my "gift." I had to remind myself to check my anger because biting ones head off is not a sign of love.

Reading how Christ shows His love to us was a perfect way to end the week. Giving up His life was enough, but to do all those other things just to make sure we know how deep His love runs was just overwhelming. To know He prays for me was pretty special. I feel praying for others shows how much you care about that person and their well being. I find myself praying for just about everyone that I have every come in contact with and those I read about in the news. My list gets longer and longer everyday because I never want to miss an opportunity to pray for protection and blessings over those people. Prayer is just so powerful and I have never really thought about Jesus praying for me, but hey I'll take all the help I can get!

Ladies, I hope you learned something new about God's love for you and how we are called to love each other. It's a powerful emotion and I hope we all use it wisely.

To Live by the Spirit

Last week I had said this coming study was going to be intense. Well I'm not sure intense was the right word to describe it. Slap in the face is more appropriate or it was for me anyway. God had my number and He kept calling until I answered.

This week I walked away knowing that I have to let go of all my sin, anger, bitterness, jealously, selfish ambition, and pretty much all the other sinful natures listed in Galatians 6:19-21 before I can ever think about taking the next step forward. Now this isn't something new to me. I know that I have to let it go but it was something that Beth said in her video that really got my attention. She said "nothing sin can give us is worth what it is taking from us."

For me, I wear my sin as badge of disgrace. I hold on to it so I know never to go down that path again. I relive all those moments where I followed the flesh/world instead of the Spirit just as a reminder. And every time I relive those moments I feel worse and worse about myself and who I am as a Christian. I'm realizing that reliving those moments and constantly thinking about them is only hindering me from becoming closer to God. It is pushing Him away and I can never really give Him my full attention because I am constantly living in the past.

One of the first things I'm going to have to learn is to have a daily prayer session before I even start my day, no matter how early 5:30 comes, confessing my sins and accepting forgiveness. To tell God what's on my mind and tell Him what my hopes and desires are. Beth says we need to pour out our thoughts so that God can pour in His Spirit. To remember that "if I'm full of myself, I can't be full of the Spirit."

My hope is that you are already well ahead of me in this aspect of you life and that you start you day off with God. I'm getting a little better about it. Sometimes I spend my whole shower talking to God depending on if I'm coherent enough to think.

I guess I need to take a small step back. I got ahead of myself a little already taking about be filled with the Holy Spirit and didn't really go into Day 1's study of who the Holy Spirit is. Umm this has pretty much always been a mystery to me. Growing up I never fully got the concept, just assumed all 3 were different. But actually after reading The Shack I got a better understanding of how all 3 work together are all 1. Now I know that book was fiction, but I'm a visual person so it helped me understand better that its the same person playing 3 different roles and Day 1 helped me fully understand the Holy Spirits role. It just amazes me how complex this is yet so simple!

I guess I missed the memo of you girls loving to break out into song, so I have posted on my favorite songs that I found on YouTube. It gets me every time and I even cried like a baby this morning in church when we sang it! Poor Brent, I'm not sure he knew what to do with me!

Have a wonderful week ladies!

Free At Last!

I'm not sure how many times I have started to write only to erase everything I have written. There is just so much going on in my head that I don't know how to put it all down.

There were many things that jumped out at me this week; Paul's amazing story of never giving up and reminding us that being a Christian doesn't mean we live on easy street. The reminder that despite my horrible past that haunts me, God has chosen me as one of His own and He doesn't make mistakes! That winning the approval of the world isn't going to get me anywhere. And Abraham and Sarah's story always gets me thinking what if I was in their shoes. Would I laugh in God's face if at 90 something He told me I would have a child as Sarah did? But what stood out the most for me was the 10 Characteristics of the Crucified Life. Here are the ones that made me wince when I read them knowing God was trying to get my attention.

The second one, 'you must abandon your own will and your own agenda.' I like being in control of my life; calling all the shots so letting God have total control is hard for me. After many struggles, I realized that doing it my way wasn't going to work. I drove myself crazy trying to figure out what I was supposed to do with my life; change jobs, change cities, go back to school, or just give up. After being reminded of Jeremiah 29:11, I decided that I would just have to turn it all over to God. I found so much peace in letting Him have it all. It was amazing! I could finally sleep!

'You must go "outside the camp."' Hello! My biggest struggle to date! I have never been comfortable sharing my testimony and my faith. I feel awkward and as if I'm going to screw up so bad that I will actually turn someone away from God even more. Even doing this blog is a HUGE uncomfortable thing for me. I'm trying to let go of all that insercurity and realize that I don't have to be some big scholar to talk about my faith and what God is doing in my life.

I had the chance to teach my Sunday school class one Sunday. I was terrified from the minute I said yes. I had such panic attacks throughout that whole month I had to prepare that I thought I would die before I ever go to teach. I was praying hard that we would be down in numbers that week, but lucky me we had a packed house! After it was all over, I realized that day was a turning point for me in my faith. It was when I decided that I had to be all or nothing. So stepping out of your comfort zone may send you into a complete hysteria, but it might just help you grow as a Christian.

'You must forego your rights.' I have a hard time letting things go. If someone hurts me I will carry the angry around with me forever. The thing is even if I have the right to be angry, Christ can never fully be in me because anger has take up residence in my heart. He had every right to be angry at those who betrayed Him, but He never let it get in His way of loving them. I'm constantly reminding myself that I can never fully be forgiven if I haven't fully forgiven those who have wronged me.

You may have found different ones speaking to you and if you feel like sharing, please do.

I hope this week has been good for you and that you are excited to keep going. I have had a peek at this coming week, and it is going to be intense! Have a wonderful week!